I'm not being watched

It has to be said that I have posted three, now four, blog entrees since Kerri's last one. That means I am totally unsupervised and I can say whatever I want, she isn't watching.
Since I was talking about end of the year lists in my last post but that one got way too serious I thought I would lighten the mood with MSN's 20 stranger than fiction stories of the year and point out my favorites.
I like #1 about the woman who sat on her boyfriends toilet for 2 years just for the ick factor, and the fact that no one thought this was odd enough behavior to call someone for 2 years.
#3 mans coffin kills wife on the way to the cemetery. To summarize there was a car accident and the coffin was pushed forward and hit her in the back of the neck killing her. The best part of this story is that the hearse was being driven buy the dead person's son. He needs a Darwin award.
#6 family cremated mom on barbecue. Not exactly it was more of a fire pit and then they planted a tree on the site. Home cremation could become popular if the economy keeps tanking.
#15 This is the Goldilocks robber. A man was charged with burglary after he allegedly broke into a home, ate cheese from the refrigerator, made a mess in a bathroom and fell asleep on a child's bed.
#17 Rescue crews had to cut apart a portable toilet to rescue a man who got stuck naked inside the potty. Authorities say the 31-year-old man used his cell phone to call 911 on Sunday from inside a portable toilet.
Police say the man had been drinking and had taken off his clothes. Somehow, he immersed himself in the holding tank. He also needs a Darwin award.
So those are my favorite off the list. I hope they brought a smile to your face. I think the one about home cremation will have Kerri monitoring my posts more closely.
Have a day and a Happy New Year!
R.

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas to all and Happy New Year! Since we are coming to the end of another year I've begun to notice that every newspaper, website, radio station, and TV stations are making lists. Lists of the bests, worsts, most popular, things we will never see again (like zima which I think everyone is happy about).
So because I have entirely to much time to spend on the internet I've been looking at these lists and one thing on one list really screamed out at me. On Newsweek's website the 8th most viewed story of the year was an article about how ugly crocs are. For anyone who lives under a rock crocs are those rubber dishwasher safe shoes not large reptiles. It doesn't bother me that this article was written, it doesn't bother me that there are a lot of people who want to defend their right to wear dishwasher safe shoes. Like this one who must really like her crocs
"I read this article on the paper Newsweek, and I was disgusted. Newsweek, I can't believe you published this offensive and self-centered article. Very disappointing. If you hate crocs, don't buy them, ignore them, or just write about your hatred on your little blog. Don't just attack them on a world-wide, influential and renowned publication like that" To write something this serious about a pair of shoes this person must have stock in the company.
No matter what you think of the footwear the sad thing is that this article was viewed more times then almost anything else on Newsweek's website this whole year. The few articles that beat is included the Obama election and the religious fanatics in Texas. After it was an article on the religious case for gay marriage and the american girl who committed murder in Italy. These articles sound more important to me but they were not read as many times as the fashion article.
So here is my idea. Next year perhaps we can all try a little harder to read the actual news articles on the web sites in addition to the ones that are funny and maybe we can avoid this happening again. Thank you for your co-operation and Merry Christmas.
R.

Continued Moms - Can't live with them, can't tie a cement block to their legs and throw them in the lake

My mom called back. So I asked if she wanted to be discussed on our little blog and Kerri would you believe her answer was "No, because I'm afraid what the two of you might say". Ha at least she included you also.
have a day!
R

Moms - Can't live with them, can't tie a cement block to their legs and throw them in the lake

Kerri I think this is a problem unique to you. I'm pretty sure my mom doesn't want me talking about her on this site. Just to be sure I'm gonna ask. Pick up cell phone *ring* *ring* *ring* voicemail. Crap I have to try later. I'm pretty sure her answer is going to be along the lines of - God you better not be writing about me where everyone can read it, have you lost your mind. But I will get back to you with an exact quote.
As far as at home dog grooming goes I feel the need to mention that I have had the doggy dremmel for almost 2 months now and Wolfgang seems to have no problem with it and Nikki believes it to be an alien device sent to kill her. I still can't get near her feet with it turned on. I hope your having better luck at your house Kerri.
R.

Mommy Dearest

Hello readers. I was on the phone chatting with my mom the other day and she mentioned she sent the link for this blog to some of her friends mostly so they could see pictures of the kids (I attached some recent pics of the kids just for her enjoyment). During the conversation she mentioned that she was sad because I never talk about her in my blog posts. I guess I was trying to spare her feelings :) but if she wants me to talk about her and she requested it then I feel she is now fair game. Hey, she asked for it. Seriously, what mother in her right mind actually requests her daughter to talk about her? Does she think I'll blog about how super wonderful she is and how she hasn't aged in years? Doubt it. So be warned mom (I know you're reading this) everything you now say or do can be potential fodder for my blog. muah hahahahahaha. Let me explain how crazy she can be. Just now as I'm writing she called and I told her I was writing about her request to be written about. She then begins to tell me about pictures I can include and things I can say about her. She actually trying to dictate my potential mom posts. She really does want me to turn this into a blog about her. Hey, just hold your horses there lady - Get your own blog!

On another note...I found a link for the word of the day on merriam-webster online. Today's word is undulant • \UN-juh-lunt\. What a lovely word. Rising and falling in waves. in contrast the word of the day for the new york times is progenitor. perfect for a blog about my mom. Progenitor \prō-ˈje-nə-tər, prə-\ · (noun) 1 a : an ancestor in the direct line : b : a biologically ancestral form.

Coming soon, a post about grooming my dogs myself. an adventure in torture and humiliation. to be posted in Rachel's honor for all dog moms out there.

peace out,
k

Paige is doing yoga in the background

just thought the world should meet my favorite dog

This is my tough dog Nikki under her favorite Christmas quilt. She loves it so much that she will stay in this position for hours. I really have nothing interesting to say at the moment. I'll write more when i do

Birthday Parties

Wow! Sorry readers, it's been a long time since our last post. Personally I have been uber-busy with the usual and in addition both of the kid's birthdays. Jak just turned 1 and Paige turned 4. Let's just say that when you have 2 kids' birthdays within 10 days of each other it's like the birthday party that will never end. Cake on one birthday, a holiday, a party, cake on another birthday, a party. Paige has no clue that her birthday really is only one day :)

I would like to talk about birthdays. As a friend and reader, Emily, wrote,
"Oh PLEASE tell me you will write about children's b-day parties. Is it me or are there a lot of people out there who think that their little angel's 3rd b-day necessitates a party with engraved invitations where you make people who only see you quarterly hang out at "go Bananas" until you want to "go postal"?

I will admit, we had a big party for Paige's 1st birthday at a pizza banquet room. Mostly because we simply could not fit everyone in our house. It turned out looking much fancier than it actually was. I really got my money's worth. Poor Jak did not get the same treatment. the second kid really does get the shaft. Anyway since then I have had one other actual "party" for Paige and that was last year at our local Park Rec center. I did it because Jak was just born and I wanted her birthday to feel special and not like she was forgotten because of a new baby. So this year I thought hmmmm I'll just have a little party at home with pizza and cake, no big thing just a get together, a joint party for both kids. Boy, am I crazy! Let's just say that no party with just friends and family is ever small. It was a great time and I'm glad we did it but I have decided that now there will be no big parties except on the "big birthdays". It's too much with both birthdays so close and thanksgiving and christmas thrown in there too. This was my first year with both kids having birthdays so I guess it's a learning curve. Even though it was crazy, it was fun. Paige loved every minute and Jak was totally thrilled with all the attention. Note to self - make the kids happy but don't go crazy doing it!

Since we usually have our neighbor buddies over for cake on the actual birthday from now on we will just do that and maybe a play date with the closest friends. I think that was my favorite part of the birthday madness this year. I did a small tea party after school with her class buddies (as a mom suggested) just have a few friends, more like a play date. Tiny sandwiches and snacks and treats, apple juice in tea cups. Lots of "please" and "thank you ma'am", so super cutie!

The worst thing about a big birthday party every year is that you really are setting the bar pretty high early on. People go to great lengths now for fantastic parties at fun places. If I did that every year what is my kid going to expect on her 10th birthday? A private circus show with gifts for everyone and a 8 tier cake? I just can't keep up with it. I have seen it getting really competitive. So who are we having these parties for, the kids or us? I know they enjoy it but let's be serious, don't kids like just about any kind of attention? I know my kid would be just as happy with a few of her friends as she would be in a big party.

I say all this now and I know the readers with older kids are saying "just you wait, just you wait until your kid is whining for that super expensive cell phone/ipod/navigation/book-reader/bottle-opener and huge party at some fancy place because all her friends are doing it". Ug, I guess I'll just wait and hope for the best!